When faced with a string of negative experiences and a lack of positive prospects, it is natural to feel that my life sucks.
Although your friends and family seem to be enjoying themselves, you feel as though your life is not going well. You have a general understanding of the issues contributing to this feeling, but have not yet taken effective steps to improve your situation
This article will not provide unhelpful suggestions such as “Be happy, others have it worse, so you shouldn’t be unhappy.” You have likely encountered this type of advice before, which is why you are reading this now.
There are several specific and practical steps you can take immediately to improve your current situation and work towards a happier tomorrow. Taking action now can help make your life less difficult.
Does your life truly sucks?
It is common for individuals to have moments where they feel negative about their lives, often in response to small inconveniences such as missing a bus or encountering bad weather. The use of the phrase “FML” (F*** My Life) has become prevalent in everyday conversation to express dissatisfaction with minor occurrences.
For example, feeling ill after a night of drinking, running late for work, or stubbing your toe might prompt the statement “FML, my life sucks.
The point being made here is that these minor issues are not the true reasons for feeling unsatisfied with one’s life. If you have come across this article, it is likely that you are dealing with more significant problems that extend beyond a temporary inconvenience such as a hangover or bad weather.
If you feel that your life is not fulfilling, this article is for you.
This article is intended for individuals who:
-experience severe anxiety and dread starting their day and going to work
-constantly feel lonely and sad
-perceive their life as lacking purpose and feel a sense of worthlessness on a regular basis
If this resonates with you, you have come to the right place.”
How to deal when your life sucks?
It’s likely that you’ve been told to “just cheer up” or “toughen up” in the past. Perhaps you’ve even tried implementing these suggestions, but found that they were ineffective.
If you feel that your life is not going well, what you need are practical and effective strategies to improve your circumstances or perspective. Some of the following steps may not resonate with you, but they have been successful for others who have experienced similar struggles.
Let’s begin working on solutions.
Connect with others, communicate, hug, and cry
Humans are naturally social beings, but when facing difficult situations, it is common to withdraw and push others away.
While some alone time can be beneficial, in times of intense emotions such as anger, sadness, grief, and fear, it is important to have the support and presence of loved ones.
This can be a counselor, a friend, a family member, or even a pet. It’s essential to find a way to express and release what you are feeling.
Seeking out someone who can provide a safe and supportive space is important, if you don’t have this kind of support in your immediate circle, consider finding a therapist or counselor. Even spending time with a pet can have therapeutic benefits.
During difficult times, it is natural to resist, protest and fight against everything and everyone. However, this approach can lead to exhaustion, and eventually, the only option left is to give in.
Surrendering or letting go should not be considered as a sign of weakness, but rather as an act of wisdom and courage. It is when the ego accepts that it needs healing.
Some ways to actively let go include:
- Practicing breath work
- Engaging in rituals of release
- Reflecting on your emotions through journaling.
A tool for coping with life’s challenges: expressive writing
While not all problems are severe, they often bring emotional turmoil. While talking to others can be beneficial, it can also be risky if they are judgmental.
One effective alternative is expressive writing. Research suggests that giving our minds a chance to process and make sense of our difficulties can lead to positive outcomes.
For example, in a study, those who wrote about their stress and trauma after losing their job were more likely to find new employment than the control group who did not write.
Expressive writing helps to organize and focus the mind, allowing for the subconscious to work on finding solutions.
Consider taking a few minutes each day to write or record your thoughts and feelings, regardless of your writing skills or grammar. The act of expressing yourself is what matters. You can choose to discard, delete or keep your writing, it’s up to you. Don’t hold back in your expression.
Be your own supportive friend, rather than your harshest critic when life sucks
Happiness stems from self-approval and the freedom to be oneself. Instead of seeking validation from others, recognize that you are worthy as you are.
Keep in mind that many people struggle with self-doubt and uncertainty about their life choices, just like you. Don’t give more weight to other people’s opinions than your own. There is no one who has all the answers when it comes to life.
Additionally, be mindful of the words you use when describing yourself, as they can manifest into reality. Avoid speaking negatively about yourself.
When you make the choice to have faith in yourself, to embrace and respect yourself, you will find that the world around you will mirror that attitude. It is best to make the decision to have positive feelings about yourself.
Set achievable targets for yourself
Transformation occurs gradually. It is not possible to change your entire life overnight, which can be hard to accept. If you’ve identified 6 areas of your life that you want to improve, it would be wise to focus on one at a time.
Because developing habits takes time. The things you want to change may have been a part of your life for a while, and changing them will require persistence and effort. It’s important to view these changes as long-term processes, like a marathon, not a sprint. You can’t expect to work on all these issues today and be content tomorrow. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way.
For example, if you desire to improve your health, it’s an admirable but broad objective. Break it down into smaller, more defined goals such as:
- Refrain from consuming processed food during weekdays
- Engage in physical activity for 30 minutes twice a week
- Wake up before 8:00 AM 5 days a week
- Go to bed before 12:00 AM
- Take at least 5,000 steps daily
By setting specific and measurable targets, it becomes easier to establish lasting habits that will ultimately improve your overall well-being. Keep in mind that change takes time and doesn’t happen overnight.
These objectives can be further refined. For instance:
Aiming to engage in physical activity for 30 minutes twice a week? Begin by exercising for only 10 minutes tonight. Then, in 2 days, increase the duration to 20 minutes. By next week, aim to exercise for 30 minutes and so on. Building habits isn’t about immediately reaching the final outcome, it’s about incorporating the desired behavior into your daily routine.
It can be challenging to establish 10 habits simultaneously. Instead, focus on developing one habit at a time and progress to the next one once you feel comfortable with it.
Remember: This is a temporary setback. A fresh start awaits you tomorrow.
Just because today or the past week was challenging, it doesn’t mean that tomorrow won’t bring a new beginning.
A day when you can begin anew, taking steps towards your goals, with a higher chance of success, and the realization that this difficult period is only temporary and not permanent (even if it may feel that way currently).
Reflect on: What is currently going well in my life?
It’s easy to get caught up in negative thoughts when you feel that your life, week, or month isn’t going well. However, it’s important to remind yourself that there are still positive aspects in your life, even if they may be small.
When I faced challenges last year, I asked myself this question and it helped me shift my perspective and not solely focus on the negative. By doing so, I realized that several essential things like my small business, my exercise routine, and flossing habit were progressing well, and that I had recently experienced enjoyable experiences as well.
Recognize that you have control over your own life
Even if your life sucks due to a serious health condition or a loss of a loved one, it’s important to remember that you still have agency in shaping your life.
It may be disheartening to realize that there is nothing you can do about the cause of your struggles.
However, it’s important to understand that this doesn’t mean that everything is doomed. Generally speaking, happiness is composed of:
- 10% from external factors
- 50% from genetics
- 40% from one’s own perspective
Even if external factors may be out of your control, you still have the power to influence your happiness through your own outlook and perspective.
Even though current circumstances may be causing you distress, it doesn’t mean that you are destined for unhappiness.
Embrace this powerful happiness exercise when life sucks
All you need is a place to write and reflect. Set aside 20-30 minutes to envision your life one year, five years, or ten years from now. Imagine it exactly as you want it to be, with everything turning out positively and you living the life of your dreams.
Write it down. Describe what it looks like, how you feel, and what you’re doing. What amazing accomplishments have you achieved? Don’t worry about how you got there, just that you have.
To get the most out of this exercise, be consistent. Writing daily for a month will help you develop a positive mindset. You can learn more about it here.
It may not come easy at first, but keep going. Be patient and stay optimistic. Eventually, things will fall into place.
Thank you for reading and sharing this article. Together, let’s support one another.